mad woman

I was 8 when an adult male stranger tried to kiss me in a public pool. I would never forget the adrenaline of picking up my toddler brother and running back toward my parents. And for a while after that, my mom would only let me wear a shirt and shorts to the pool.

I have always enjoyed numbers. At 14, I expressed interest and worked hard to get an opportunity to attend a math conference. But the teacher picked the second-highest scorer and jokingly told me "guys are better at math anyway". That was the moment I lost all interest.

The first time I managed a project at 24, a man twice my age made jokes (during a global meeting) that all I was gonna do there is make them coffee or look pretty for clients. I sat there stunned as I uncomfortably laughed. Later that day, I found myself crying at a female director's office and she told me, "you're a woman, and if you want to excel here, you have to rise above these small things".

I had just left a long-term relationship at 27 when a male co-worker offhandedly mentions that I need to find a new boyfriend soon. In his words "motherhood is the end goal of being a woman", and if I wait any longer, I would miss my chance. When confronted about his sexism, he replies "that's what I believe in eh".

At 30, I can afford my own place, my own car, and the cost to maintain a comfortable lifestyle without any assistance from a partner or my parents. I was told that dating women like me is difficult for a man's ego.

All my life, I've been told to be nice, to protect myself, and to be the bigger person. You’re not assertive - you’re “bossy”. You’re not strategic - you’re “manipulative”. Women who rely on men are “gold diggers”, but if you’re more successful than anyone you date, you’re “emasculating”. We are pressured into popping out children without thought of life-altering changes to our bodies, our lifestyles, and our careers. Women who choose careers are selfish. Stay-at-home moms are overworked and unappreciated. It's a constant cycle of trying to survive double standards stacked against us.

And I'm sick of all of it.

'mad woman' is for the empowered sad girls owning their fire and letting it burn brighter than ever 🔥

scent strength guide